underwhelmer: "seriously, guys, how much do I look like Jan Michael Vincent right now?"
underwhelmer: "it puts the lotion in the backpack."
underwhelmer: "here is my handle, here is my spout!"
underwhelmer: "guys, wait up. I need to rinse off my umbilical cord."
underwhelmer: "i will blow jeff corwin for any reason. any reason at all."
underwhelmer: "skipping is just the best."
underwhelmer: "am I close enough? is this close enough?"
underwhelmer: "today truly is a grand day."